Today, we had to make the awful decision to say a final goodbye to my sweet Daisy dog. I know I don’t have to explain to anyone who Daisy was because she was basically internet famous due to her fearless fashion sense.
And love of America, obviously.
While it’s obvious that Daisy was my best friend, it isn’t as obvious that she was my hero. When I first got Daisy, I actually didn’t plan to get her at all. I drug my mom in a pet store so I could hold a puppy and get a fix. This little white fur ball attempted to bite me through the glass case but once I got her in my arms, she snuggled in and that was it. She had my heart.
Over the past 11 years, Daisy got me through some incredibly dark times. From when I was struggling to pull myself out of a liquor bottle, to when I went through a divorce, to helping me find the courage to give my whole heart to someone even if I was afraid it would be broken again. She exemplified a loving creature and put up with what I am 99% sure is the world’s most annoying kitten.
It’s hard to lose someone you love who saved you so many times you lose count. I know, however, that she’s in a far better place and at her final peace. So, I say goodbye to you, my best friend, and wish you a comfortable bed and all the bacon you can eat on the other side of the rainbow bridge. Our hearts will be emptier without you but our cups ran over during your time with the love you provided.
This morning, I woke up and had the weirdest feeling. At first, I thought it was because it was 4:50 am and that’s even early for me. After reviewing the headlines (aka Instagram and Facebook), I realized I was still feeling pretty solid so I may as well get up and get on the Peloton. I did a relatively challenging (for me) class but even after that, I felt pretty good. It was a Forrest Gump type of morning because I decided since I was going, I may as well keep on going. After packing my lunch and puttering around the house, I was ready to leave for work about 30 minutes early. Again, I couldn’t shake this weird feeling that was seeping down inside me. It wasn’t until I was driving to work and singing along to Don’t Bring Me Down that I suddenly could define the feeling.
It’s taken me almost 3 weeks to write this post. To be honest, it’s still kind of hard to write now. I’m sure there were people following along and wondering if I didn’t make it, which might explain why I hadn’t wrote about it yet. The truth, however, is that I did indeed ride 100 days in a row. I made it. My goal was met. Woohoo?
This morning, I woke up and honestly feel like what I imagine it feels like to be hit by a truck. Okay, let’s take that back and use something I’ve actually been through — I feel like I flew over the handlebars of my bike and full-body slid across the asphalt without wearing a helmet. I hurt everywhere. My head aches. My joints ache. Every ounce of muscle and fat in my body are on revolt and working towards making me give up and just go somewhere and lay down. I mean, it is taking all I’ve got to be able to type at this moment. I’m not really sure how I’m going to make it through the day. I’m very not sure how I’m going to make it through a workout, even if it’s only a 10 minute one. Do I have the flu? What’s causing me to have this horrible reaction?
Getting back to eating healthy for exactly three days.
That’s right. My body hates me for not eating all the cookies and delicious chips and salsa that my soul desires. What’s weird about it is that I haven’t been craving these items either, which is a miracle in and of itself. However, today I am feeling the reaction ones body can have when you take away some of what it’s used to having. I mean, it’s not like I’ve given up sweets or savory food. Last night, I had a party cup (ice cream) and homemade bruschetta. I’m not going without is my point. However, when you go from eating an entire box of cookies to not eating any cookies, that’s a pretty significant cut to your sugar content. I should also mention that MyFitnessPal helped me decide on a daily goal of 1690 calories. This was actually a big relief to me. The thought of just 1200 calories a day after having been eating so many was overwhelming and almost got me off track before I even started back on the right track. Why am I bringing this up? I’m bringing it up because anytime I post something like this someone inevitably reaches out, concerned I’m not eating enough. I promise I am eating plenty. I mean, look at this plate full of plenty from Saturday night:
I know from experience that this feeling should cut out in 2-3 more days. Knowing that, however, doesn’t make the next few days any easier. I’m going to keep trucking along but if someone could have a little talk with my body and tell it to chill it’s roll, I’d greatly appreciate it.
What’s your go to when your body hates you for doing what’s good for it? Rest? Toughness? Tequila?
Do you ever stop and think of the ways there are to describe when you’ve gained a bit of weight?
Gaining a bit of weight
Put on a few pounds
Gettin’ a little chunky
Wearing my winter weight
…and so on. While I’m all in on all of these phrases, I’d like to just jump right on in with my point of this post and state that I’m getting fat. Again. Whew. That feels better. Dancing around an issue is freakin’ exhausting. I have three pairs of pants that sort of fit and if I’m wearing anything other than a tunic I feel like I’m a busted can o’ biscuits outside on a steamin’ hot day. Yes, I have worked out every day for over 90 days but I’ve been eating whatever I feel like eating and working out really doesn’t outlast a crappy way of eating.
Now wait Susan, you say, it can’t be that bad! Here’s an example of what all I’ve been shoveling in my face as of late:
Delicious, cheesy mushroom and swiss burgers
Gallons of ranch dressing
Boxes (yes, plural) of Girl Scout Cookies
Bags of chips and jars of salsa
No vegetables, unless they are smothered in ranch dressing
One banana a day because hey, a gal has to be healthy right?
The result of this is that I’m back in my “fat” mode and there’s no dancing around it. I’m not happy with how my body is, as is a common reoccurring theme of ye ol’ blog. Today, though, I did take a minute and realize I really do have to get my crap together. What’s my plan? Well, I’m turning back to counting my calories but I’m not going to go with the 1200 calorie a day plan. Seriously, I don’t know how that works ever. I’m probably eating like 1,000,000 calories right now so dropping to 1,200 would ensure I’d die of starvation or commit homicide due to being hangry. Starting this morning, I’m back on MyFitnessPal and ready to roll.
I’d like to start this whole thing off by giving all those bloggers out there who blog every day a great big shout out. Every time I start blogging again, I think “Okay! This time is the one! I’m going to be committed and write and write. All of my blogs will be witty and intriguing. Let’s go!” Within a week, or perhaps a couple days, I end up running straight out of things that I find interesting to say and just stop blogging. With trying to do the 100 days of riding my Peloton every day, I was sure I could stay at least pretty committed. I mean, it provides its own content. Alas, as you can tell, that hasn’t happened. I did, however, want to drop in to give an update since I am almost at the end of my journey.
Yes, though I am awful at sticking to blogging, I have managed to stick with the 100 days. I have 10 days to go. Guys, that means I’ve made it through 90 days. 90 days. Those days included sinus issues, stomach issues, lazyarse issues, and all kinds of life trying to get in the way. All of my rides haven’t been long but I’ve been active all those days. As I mentioned before, I sure am tired. As I’m getting closer to the end, my workouts have went to the lower times, with the longest of this week being 30 minutes. A big part of me feels like stopping but the bigger, more stubborn part of me is like SERIOUSLY SUSAN??! So, 10 more days and there we go.
When I first started my journey towards riding my Peloton 100 days in a row, I fully intended to blog every day about every ride. Life, however, got in the way. It turns out that just finding the time to get in a ride is all the time I have sometimes. Thus, the blog hasn’t been kept up to date. I could say I’m going to do better but I’d rather not lie. Today, though, someone asked me if I had made it to a hundred rides yet. When they asked me, if occurred to me that others might be wondering too. Some may even be thinking that I quit.